One of the hardest things in life must be trying to erase someone from our memory who had hurt us badly. It is even worse when it is someone who had a special place in our lives, such as a boyfriend, girlfriend, best friend, etc. It is painfully, and just the thought of it has made many fall into depression.
Well, this article offers you tips on how to forget someone. It won’t be easy, but you would feel peace, satisfaction, and happiness after all. And that is what matters most. Let this guide walk you through.
Don’t Try Too Hard
This might seem counterintuitive, but it is true. Forgetting someone is much more than trying so hard to forget. The more you try to remove every thought of someone from your head, the more you think about the person and the sadder you become.
That is the paradox of trying so hard, and that is not how to forget someone. So what should be done instead? Accept what has happened and the fact that you can’t undo it (unless there’s such a thing as time travel). Understand that acceptance is necessary to move on.
Talk To Someone
It’s almost impossible to overemphasize the need to talk to someone when you feel hurt by someone. Of course, the person must be someone you trust, such as a friend, parent or therapist.
Talking with someone is not necessarily to seek advice or solutions. Just pouring out your pain and sadness and having someone to listen is itself soothing. No matter the hurt, having a clear head is essential to avoid taking rash actions.
Remove All Reminders
For this to be effective, you also have to remove everything that reminds you of the person. Remove pictures and portraits, presents, souvenirs and other such things that are sure to bring you memories. Pictures especially have this effect.
Even on your phone and computer, remove all photos and videos of and with the person. Since you want to forget them, it only makes sense that you remove everything that reminds you of them. Give the items out, throw them away, keep them with a friend, it does not matter. Just keep them away from yourself.
Well, what better way is there to forget someone than to avoid every contact with them? That means not going to places where you are sure to find them except it is absolutely necessary. Avoiding them also includes disconnecting them from every social media platform.
After all, you are trying to erase them from your memory. So they should not be able to contact you any longer on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, WhatsApp, Telegram, everywhere. Make sure they find it impossible to reach you. Add their mobile number to your phone’s blacklist too so that they would not be able to call or text you.
Do all this so you can have time to recover from the hurt because contact with them will most likely bring back the pain when you have not fully healed.
Even after all the above is done, you may have achieved nothing if you are not involved in some activity that distracts you from what happened and helps you focus on the present.
That includes things like yoga, meditation, etc. Also, you could exercise and take up hobbies and games you find interesting to push away every thought of them.
Don’t just block the person and think that is all. Get involved in something else, play exciting games, volunteer, anything to make you focus on the present.
Being hurt is undoubtedly very painful, but the fact that someone hurt you doesn’t mean you should sit at home all day sulking. That would only make you sadder and probably depressed.
Instead, go out and enjoy life! Don’t stop the fun things you used to do because you’ve been hurt. Go to clubs and bars, the movies, shows, events, conferences, etc. Live life normally and be yourself.
Don’t stop meeting new people too. Feel free to make new friends, join groups, go on dates, be happy!
Take a Vacation
If necessary and if you can, do take a vacation. It is beneficial, and can even be therapeutic. You especially need to make this step if the person you want to forget stays in your area or city and you can’t move somewhere else.
A vacation to a different place is a chance to avoid the person and enjoy life differently. This can last as long as you want it to and you may come back when you have fully gotten over it.
Vacation has worked for many, and they would sure recommend it as how to forget someone.
Well, sometimes, these steps might even turn out to be too hard to carry out if the person stays close to you or if you are classmates or coworkers. Also, if you are members of the same social or religious group and you’ll always meet.
These factors might make forgetting someone tough, but you can still find a way around it. Avoid every conversation except it is absolutely unavoidable.
Note the word ‘absolutely.’ Do not give in to the temptation of being physically close with them and never engage in casual conversation. You are not trying to make enemies but make it clear that you would rather have your space.
As mentioned above, devising how to forget someone is very hard, but if that is what is necessary, you should go ahead. You may find out that you still sometimes have thoughts of the person, but this is perfectly normal.
No one can be obliterated from your memory (and not someone you once held in high esteem) unless your mind is wiped clean. That is the message of the first point; don’t try too hard, just accept what has happened and be yourself, live normally, be happy and watch yourself move on. You should not sacrifice your peace for anyone.